What's in the name - Shakespeare

Romeo & Juliet, Act 2 Scene 2

“What’s in a name? That which we call a rose By any other name would smell as sweet.” said Juliet

My grandfather, who is now 80 years old, suffers from an early stage of dementia. It is very easy for him to forget his surroundings, daily activities, places, identity, and.....people!

He doesn't remember names, there are times when his own daughters visit him and while offering gifts tends to ask in an utmost childish tone, "Did you recognize me? Who am I? What's my name?"

To which, he will politely accept the gift and gently smile in return. The gentle smile simply conveys, I know you are someone very close to me, my very own but I cannot recollect your name, my dear.

Nevertheless. the daughters do not even expect him to remember. They too have accepted his old age signs.

Of all the names he could recollect, he would never tend to forget his wife's, my Grandma's name, "Vimal, I am hungry". "Vimal, I need to sleep". "Vimal, Let's go outside." This is the only name he remembers in a very obvious way, for my Grandma is the one who attends to him every second. She answers all his queries daily with respect and patience.

Grandpa and Grandma stay with my maternal uncle. The house is shared by my uncle, his wife, his daughter, and the old couple. They stay just about a few kilometers from my house, which makes it easy for me to visit them often.

The house is full of people during occasions, our family believes in celebrating all festivals together, so that is the time when each and every member from my Mother's side of the family would be present in the house and prefer to stay for a couple of days. It's the best time for everyone, except............. I guess Grandpa.

The most common thing about everyone visiting would be to bring him gifts and then start the game of asking questions, "Did you recognize me?", "Tell me my name", "Do you recollect my name?" As much as he enjoys having loads of people around, he feels sad about not being able to recognize anyone, let alone remembering their names. There is always a slight disappointment in his smile when he fails to recall anyone's name even after knowing that they are someone he is very close to.

One day, my Maternal uncle's family decided to go for a week-long trip. Obviously, the primary question was, who would look after Granpa, as Grandma alone won't be able to look after him. He has grown weaker and is mostly bed-ridden these days. I easily volunteered, with Covid around, working from home still prevailed, and another primary reason was, I have always enjoyed my Grandparents' company.

Thus, started our routine of staying together. I and Grandma both woke up early in the morning, as Grandpa is an early-riser, it is better that way to look after him and make sure he took bath on time and had breakfast. None of us wanted him to miss his morning medicines or even delay them. He himself has been very particular about punctuality all his life.

We started our day by cooking breakfast together, Grandma had this habit of listening to old Marathi devotional songs on the radio, it helps connect with the greater being, she reminded daily, also, she played them out loud enough for Grandpa to hear them. That way she believed he would wake up to a relaxed state of mind.

On the contrary, my Grandpa since his younger days has always been a short-tempered and hyper person. Old age has made him quieter, but never relaxed. These early morning devotional songs of Pandit Bhimsen Joshi would make a subtle effect in calming him down. Nevertheless for the same reason maybe, waking up to his songs has been a routine in our family for ages.

On one such usual day, Grandma was serving breakfast to my Grandpa, the renowned song, 'Maaze maaher pandhari' by Pandit Bhimsen Joshi was playing in the background. She noticed Grandpa smiling all by himself, she knew he was enjoying his favorite song of all time. She decided to take up the deadly question which Grandpa always shied away from, while serving him a hot plate of Poha, she asked, "Did you like this song? Do you know who's voice is that?"

He smiled yet again, with his usual style, but paused and answered, "Yes, that is Pandit Bhimsen Joshi"

We were shocked!! The question was meant as a sweet mockery and we never expected it could invoke a dusty memory of his adulthood favored singer.

It was an irony, here was a man, my Grandpa, who found it extremely difficult to recognize faces and yet to recollect someone merely from his voice seemed easier. They are right about music, it is a stronger emotion! When conveyed with all the mighty heart, it has the strength to remain etched in someone's memory forever!

To the man who created wonders with his voice. Who transported music to communicate with the language of the soul. I thank you today for touching one such soul who is close to my heart.

- An anonymous Grand-daughter